Daniel Manastireanu – Cateva observatii pe scurt la textul lui Danut Jemna, Crestinismul si psihologia

Daniel Manastireanu

NOTA: Am rugat pe feciorul meu, Daniel, care este atât cleric hirotinit în Church of Scotland, cât și psihoterapeut certificat, și membru cu drepturi depline al asociației profesionale britanice în domeniu, să răspundă, din perspectiva experienței lui psihoterapeutice, dar și a experiențe pastorale, la textul lui Danuț Jemna pe tema rellației creștinism -psihologie. Iată aici rezultatul.

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Dintru început trebuie să facem o distincție clară între psihologie și psihoterapie sau consiliere. Psihologia studiază în general relația dintre mecanismele de gândire, emoții și comportamentul uman. Consilierea și psihoterapia se inspiră semnificativ din teoria psihologiei, însă nu presupune întotdeauna studierea psihologiei ca disciplină în sens strict. Un consilier sau psihoterapeut nu este un psiholog. Psihologul studiază mecanismele comportamentului uman, pe când psihoterapeutul folosește în mod specific metoda conversațională ca să ajute un client/pacient să rezolve diverse probleme și dezechilibre din viața personală. Din acest punct de vedere, psihoterapia și consilierea sunt mai mult o formă de artă decât o știință exactă, deși se inspiră și se bazează pe elemente de teorie psihologică.

Psihoterapia este o disciplină în plină dezvoltare, cu o mare varietate de abordări și sisteme teoretice care evoluează constant. Ce le leagă pe toate este în mare parte o înțelegere la nivel mondial cu privire la etica relației terapeutice. Așadar, a pune mersul la biserică și mersul la psihoterapeut într-o relație de polarizare de aceeași natură cu dihotomia religie – știință reprezintă o eroare epistemologică.

Este adevărat că din ce în ce mai mulți oameni în occident preferă să meargă la psihoterapeut decât la pastor/preot, însă aceasta nu este o alegere direct alternativă. Liderii religioși nu pierd oameni pentru că aceștia preferă să se ducă la psihoterapeut. Ei pierd oameni pentru că aceștia și-au pierdut interesul in serviciile oferite de liderii religioși.

Nu-i trece nimănui prin cap ideea că în general este mai bine să meargă la psihoterapeut decât la pastor. Mulți merg și la biserică, și la psihoterapeut, având așteptări radical diferite de la ambele. Astfel, găsesc că este prudent să evităm plasarea religiei și psihoterpiei într-o relație strict dualistă. Este adevărat că psihologia poate fi folosită pentru a manipula oameni în contextul religios, precum poate fi folosită pentru a manipula oameni în camera de consiliere. În final, este o chestiune de etică, după cum am menționat mai sus.

Scopul principal al consilierii și psihoterapiei este să ajute clientul printr-o serie de conversații să ajungă la un punct în care este capabil să-și rezolve propriile probleme. Din acest punct de vedere, în majoritatea abordărilor nu se folosește un model medical sau clinic, în care clientul vine la specialist pentru un diagnostic și un tratament aplicat fără implicarea directă a pacientului. Psihoterapia se bazează pe formarea unei relații terapeut – client de încredere reciprocă, de educație a clientului și de colaborare apropiată. După cum spunea Scott Peck, clientul încheie psihoterapia în momentul în care poate fi și ea/el terapeut pentru altcineva. Majoritatea nu ajung la acest nivel pentru că puțini sunt dispuși să depună așa de mult efort. (Am parafrazat din Scott Peck.)

Mersul la duhovnic se aseamănă într-o anumită măsură cu psihoterapia în termenul formării unei relații de încredere și formare personală. Abordarea însă este radical diferită. Un consilier sau psihoterapeut bun nu dă sfaturi ca un duhovnic. Psihoterapeutul ajută clientul să ajungă el la deciziile folositoare pentru viața și situația lui specifică, conform metodologiei sale și sistemului etic. A da sfaturi ar fi o gravă eroare terapeutică. Din acest punct de vedere, poate n-ar fi rău ca duhovnicii să învețe câte ceva din etica și metodologia psihoterapiei. Mersul la biserică e cu totul altceva. Mulți clienți în psihoterapie merg la biserică. Unii sunt pastori. Unii psihoterapeuți sunt pastori, și abordează pastorala și psihoterapia ca două discipline distincte, deși învață una de la alta.

Cam atât, deocamdată.

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Daniel Manastireanu – Conversations with My Father: On the Road Ahead

Omul evanghelic. O explorare a comunitatilor protestante romanesti

Dragi prieteni,

Vă anunț, cu un sentiment de mare ușurare, că astăzi, înainte de prânz, „după lupte seculare”, care au durat mai mult de… zece ani, am predat la Polirom textele definitive și am semnat contractul final pentru volumul Omul evanghelic. O explorare a comunităților protestante românești. Este vorba de un volum masiv, de circa 650 de pagini, format mare, ce include texte elaborate de 19 autori, din interiorul și din afara mediului evanghelic.

Volumul va apărea în librării cel mai târziu până la începutul lunii septembrie, iar până la finalul aceleiași luni va fi disponibilă și versiunea ebook.

În viitorul apropiat voi voi începe să comunic, din când în când, mai multe informații despre acest proiect editorial.

Până atunci, pentru cei interesați, iată mai jos cuprinsul volumului.

Omul evanghelic – Cuprins

 

John Pavlovitz – A Letter to Survivors of Sexual Assault

To every person who has survived harassment, abuse, or violation:

Dear Friend,

I’ve been thinking about you and wanted you to hear a few things today, in case you never hear them for anyone else. I so hope this reaches you.

I imagine these days must be difficult for you.

Not that every day isn’t difficult given what you’ve endured, but I imagine these are especially painful times—
to see the headlines and the hashtags, and to be continually reminded of the personal hell you’ve walked through;
to watch people debate the veracity of accusers,
to see survivors cross-examined by strangers,
to hear supposed adults suggest a child’s consent,
to listen to professed Christians defend predatory politicians using the Bible,
to see lawmakers take the side of the victimizers,
to witness admitted offenders being rewarded.

What Everyone Desperately Wishes You’d Stop Doing, Based On Your Myers-Briggs Personality Type | Thought Catalog

Source: What Everyone Desperately Wishes You’d Stop Doing, Based On Your Myers-Briggs Personality Type | Thought Catalog

This is very interesting.

So, here is, according to Joshua Forte, What I (an INFP type) Desperately Wish I’d Stop Doing, Based On My Myers-Briggs Personality Type:

Acting like your dark, brooding thoughts make you superior to other people because you’re deeper and more complex than they are.

Lord, have mercy! 🙂

E-Motion – A Free Preview

e-motion

Runtime: 1h 27m | Release date: 2013

This film features: Dr. Bradley Nelson.Imagine a world where the trapped emotions, fears, anxieties and unprocessed life experiences we hold in our bodies are the source for everything that ails us. That’s the world we live in.

Now imagine a world where everyone is manifesting from their heart the perfect creation that’s inside each of us. Imagine a world where abundance, inner peace, longevity and loving relationships abound. Imagine emotion experts from around the world sharing their wisdom and negative-emotion clearing techniques to light a new pathway for humanity. Imagine we are sacred, spiritual beings here for a much larger reason, serving a much higher purpose, a divine purpose. That’s where we’re going.

Leunig – An Episode of Indiscriminate Compassion

Thanks to Philip Hunt for the link.

CS Lewis – The Humanitarian Theory of Punishment

(Thanks to Daniela Lunga for the link)

Observation: It is interesting to see reflections of the Girardian scapegoat theory, even if probably Lewis was not aware of it.

Mercy, detached from justice, grows unmerciful. An illustration explaining a theory of Crime and Punishment that C.S Lewis described as ‘a man-eating weed’. Notes below in video description.

1 Corinthians 13 and the Enneagram

Type 1

If I live my life to perfection, doing what is right and good on behalf of others, but act with compulsion and without love, then I am nothing at all.

Type 2

If I take care of the needs of everybody in the world, especially the poor, because of my own need to help, but am without love even for myself, then I am nothing at all.

Type 3

If I am efficient and successful in all that I do for the sake of justice, but act out of drivenness and without love, then I am nothing at all.

[New Post] Why Healing Our Hearts Might Be Simpler Than We Think

Source: [New Post] Why Healing Our Hearts Might Be Simpler Than We Think

Kelly Flanagan is an author I often read with great benefit. Like in this case. Enjoy! Or maibe this is not the right word.

Emoke Tapolyai – Eastern European Woundedness and the Resulting Response to Abuse

This talk was recorded on 3 June 2015, at the Forum of Christian Leaders.

An outline of this talk can be downloaded HERE.

Emőke Tapolyai is a clinical pastoral counsellor and an executive coach. She received her MA in clinical pastoral counselling from Ashland Theological Seminary, a division of Ashland University (Ashland, Ohio, USA). She is a member of the American Association of Christian Counsellors (AACC) and the Hungarian Association of Sexologists

You may find HERE more of her contributions to the Forum of Christian Leaders.

 

 

Daniela Maris – Barnevernet sau mic ghid de psihiatrie cu susu’n jos

Am urmarit cu multa atentie desfasurarea dramei familiei Bodnariu, inca de la primele informatii aparute pe social media. Asemenea multora dintre noi, am trecut si eu prin cateva stadii de procesare a realitatii, primul fiind cel de negare. In mintea mea, imaginea aceea idilica a tarilor nordice, superdezvoltate si supercivilizate, a Norvegiei in speta, cumva nu se potrivea cu incredibilul act al confiscarii a cinci copii, cel mai mic dintre ei fiind inca alaptat la san.

Am trecut la stadiul urmator, cel de informare legata de practicile faimoasei structuri de protectie a copilului numita Barnevernet. In saptamanile ce au urmat au iesit la iveala niste aspecte desprinse parca din Kafka. Tot mai multe situatii documentate, surprinzator de asemanatoare cu a familiei Bodnariu, au aparut pe scena publica. In urma publicarii cercetarilor Mariannei Haslev Skanlånd, in legatura cu cele 69 de motive ale preluarii de catre Barnevernet a copiilor, au inceput sa se lanseze intrebari de genul: “Ce are de-a face omleta si grosimea feliilor de paine cu confiscarea copiilor?”; “De ce nu are voie copilul sa le zambeasca strainilor de pe strada?”; “De ce trebuie pedepsit parintele pentru ca bebelusul intoarce fata in partea opusa cand e spalat pe fata?”, etc.

Pentru ca in spatele oricarui experiment, fie el medical, social sau de orice alta natura, sta o teorie anume, indiferent cat de geniala sau stupida ar fi ea, am incercat sa o descopar pe cea care guverneaza activitatea Barnevernet. (Recunosc ca am fost orientata in directia corecta atat de interesul meu pentru psihiatrie ce dateaza inca din facultate, cat si de munca de documentare a mai multor persoane, printre care d-na dr. Mariana Goron si d-l Steven Bennett). In acest fel am ajuns, pe de o parte, la teoria atasamentului, iar pe de alta parte, la legislatia statului norvegian privitoare la protectia copilului.

Din nou despre cazul Bodnariu. 4 observaţii şi 3 concluzii preliminare

Cum s-a schimbat societatea românească după cazul Bodnariu

Source: Din nou despre cazul Bodnariu. 4 observaţii şi 3 concluzii preliminare

Mirela Oprea, specialist in psihologie si stiintele educatiei, scrie din nou despre cazul Bodnariu.

David Benner – Human Being and Becoming

This is a book I have wanted to write for a long time but was not ready to do so. My own journey into the fullness of being human was too limited and my personal wholeness too truncated. I don’t claim to have arrived but I have discovered some very practical and concrete ways of moving toward these ideals.

We become fully human by living the incredible adventure of the life we are given and the opportunities for love that it presents. The route to wholeness is not perfection but embracing the realities of our lives – including our brokenness – and giving ourselves fully to love.This is a book I have wanted to write for a long time but was not ready to do so. My own journey into the fullness of being human was too limited and my personal wholeness too truncated. I don’t claim to have arrived but I have discovered some very practical and concrete ways of moving toward these ideals.

Love is one of the three big themes of this book. Love is the foundation of all being and becoming. But the love I describe is not the soft sentimental love of Hollywood or Hallmark cards. It is the word some cosmologists are bold enough to use to describe the attractional force that holds planets in orbit and provides the glue that holds atoms together. It is the strongest force in the universe. But it is also the gentlest. Only love can soften a hard heart, renew trust after it has been shattered, inspire trust and free us from the tyrannizing effects of fear. Love holds all things together and grounds all human being and becoming.

Bătaia nu e ruptă din Rai | Jurnal de psihoterapeut

Acum vreo două săptămâni, la sugestia unei prietene, am intrat pe un blog dedicat mamelor pentru a citi un post despre pedepsele aplicate copilului.

Source: Bătaia nu e ruptă din Rai | Jurnal de psihoterapeut

Perspectiva unui psihoterapeut asupra efectelor disciplinatrii fizice asupra copiilor.

Cazul Bodnariu. O palmă e ceva oribil. Dar asta te face un părinte psihopat?

De acord? „Cert e că decizia de a lua copiii familiei Bodnariu este una pripită, emoțională, excesivă și abuzivă”

Source: Cazul Bodnariu. O palmă e ceva oribil. Dar asta te face un părinte psihopat?

 

Iuliana Alexa este redactor șef al revistei Psychologies.

Ea prezinta in acest articol perspectiva unui psiholog asupra acestui caz, si se plaseaza pe o pozitie preponderent critica fata de actiunile statului norvegian, in principiu in baza datelor (neverificate si nevalidate)  raspindite in media de cei care se plaseaza exclusiv de partea familiei Bodnariu.

Un text care merita citit din pricina implicatiilor psihologice, de o parte si de alta a ‘baricadei’.

Im presia mea este ca desi afirma ca nu justifica disciplinarea fizica, autoarea pare foarte permisiva fata de cei care o aplica. Dar aceasta este, poate, doar o chestiune de accent.

Un caz de abuz sau mai multe? | Dilema Veche

Sînt vinovați părinții de abuzuri împotriva copiilor? Este vorba de o intoleranță a statului norvegian față de obiceiuri etnice și religioase străine de ale lui? Sînt regulile nordice de comportament familial prea drastice pentru cei nou veniți?

Source: Un caz de abuz sau mai multe? | Dilema Veche

Un text de bun simt publicat in Dilema, de psihologul Maria Iordanescu, in legatura cu cazul Bodnariu.

Si inca un indemn de renuntare la reactiile isterice care, asa cum bine spune autoarea, ‘nu folosesc nimanui’. Decit, eventual, celor care isi fac fara rusine publicitate pe spatele familiei oropsite.

Margaret Heffernan: Why it’s time to forget the pecking order at work

Organizations are often run according to “the superchicken model,” where the value is placed on star employees who outperform others. And yet, this isn’t what drives the most high-achieving teams. Business leader Margaret Heffernan observes that it is social cohesion — built every coffee break, every time one team member asks another for help — that leads over time to great results. It’s a radical rethink of what drives us to do our best work, and what it means to be a leader. Because as Heffernan points out: “Companies don’t have ideas. Only people do.”

Does your company or organisation follow this wisdom? Does mine?

The former CEO of five businesses, Margaret Heffernan explores the all-too-human thought patterns — like conflict avoidance and selective blindness — that lead organizations and managers astray.

Margaret Heffernan – The Dangers of “Willful Blindness”

Gayla Benefield was just doing her job — until she uncovered an awful secret about her hometown that meant its mortality rate was 80 times higher than anywhere else in the U.S. But when she tried to tell people about it, she learned an even more shocking truth: People didn’t want to know. In a talk that’s part history lesson, part call-to-action, Margaret Heffernan demonstrates the danger of “willful blindness” and praises ordinary people like Benefield who are willing to speak up. (Filmed at TEDxDanubia.)

The former CEO of five businesses, Margaret Heffernan explores the all-too-human thought patterns — like conflict avoidance and selective blindness — that lead organizations and managers astray.

Drive: The Surprising Truth about What Motivates Us

Brené Brown on Blame

You are probably a bit of a blamer – most of us are. But why should we give it up? In this witty sequel to our most watched RSA Short, inspirational thinker Brené Brown considers why we blame others, how it sabotages our relationships, and why we desperately need to move beyond this toxic behaviour.

Voice: Dr Brené Brown
Animation: Katy Davis AKA Gobblynne http://www.gobblynne.com
Production and Editing: Al Francis-Sears and Abi Stephenson

Watch the original talk here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXSjc-…

Follow the RSA on Twitter: https://twitter.com/RSAEvents
Like the RSA on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/thersaorg

Susan Cain – The Power of Introverts

In a culture where being social and outgoing are prized above all else, it can be difficult, even shameful, to be an introvert. But, as Susan Cain argues in this passionate talk, introverts bring extraordinary talents and abilities to the world, and should be encouraged and celebrated.

You may find HERE the transcript of this TED talk.

Gratitude – The Single Best Predictor of Well-being

Human flourishing is a new concept that tries to describe holistically human well-being. Question is, which character traits can best predict human well-being.

According to a recent study,

Out of all 24 character strengths, the only significant independent predictors of well-being were gratitude, kindness, and love of learning. Note that love, honesty, and humour were very close to being statistically significant.

The single best predictor of well-being was gratitude.

Brené Brown – The Power of Vulnerability – On Empathy vs Sympathy

Brene Brown studies human connection — our ability to empathize, belong, love. In a poignant, funny talk at TEDxHouston, she shares a deep insight from her research, one that sent her on a personal quest to know herself as well as to understand humanity. A talk to share.

Dennis Okholm – Dangerous Passions, Deadly Sins

Dennis Okholm is professor of theology at Azusa Pacific University.  He is the editor or author of several books including the well received, Monk Habits for Everyday People.

This interview revolves around Okholm’s latest book, Dangerous Passions, Deadly Sins: Learning from the Psychology of Ancient Monks .

The interview was conducted by David George Moore.  Dave blogs at www.twocities.org.

* * *

Moore: I am going to begin with a somewhat personal question.  It really is not personal, I guess, because “Rate My Professors” is public!  In any case, I was perusing the many favorable comments from your Azusa Pacific students and want to hone in on the description of one student: “He is very relaxed…”  Is being “relaxed” or we might say being at “peace” part of your natural constitution or have you grown into that virtue?  If it is the latter, what specifically has helped you?

Okholm: First, I should admit that I never look at “Rate My Professors.” The reason precisely has to do with the subject matter of this book: I need to take precautions against envy and pride, and I know that if I look at my “ratings” it will lead to both vices—with are related, by the way.

But, to answer your question, I think it simply has to do with my personality, perhaps for two reasons. In high school a church youth leader shared with me for the first time that God accepted me as I am. That gave me a confidence that I hadn’t had before. In addition, my father was a very good public speaker, and I think that rubbed off on me in such a way that it added to the confidence. So I guess the confidence expresses itself in being “relaxed.” Beyond that, I just enjoy teaching and love being with my students.

Moore:Briefly tell us the difference and relationship between the eight deadly thoughts and the seven deadly sins.

Myers-Briggs for the Holy Week Infograph

Kelly Flanagan on Unwrapping the Real You

For some time now I am following the personal blog of Kelly Flanagan, a clinical psychologist living in Wheaton, Ill. The text he has just published is, up to this moment, the best I have read this Christmas. Here is just a fragment, the most important one, I think.

* * *

I don’t believe in identity formation anymore.

Because figuring out who we are isn’t about making something new; it’s about seeing something old. There’s no such thing as identity formation; there is only identity recognition. There is only a new awareness of something original in us. In the end, we don’t make something of ourselves; we glimpse something of ourselves.

How to Be A Better Writer

 

Time magazine has just published an article presenting six tips for better writing from Harvard psychologist Steven Pinke, author of the book The Sense of Style: The Thinking Person’s Guide to Writing in the 21st Century.

Now, these tips fit more journalism writing, rather than academic writing and, even less, fiction writing. Yet, we all could learn a thing or two from it.

Here are six of Steven Pinker’s tips for good writing:

1. Be visual and conversational. Be concrete, make your reader see and stop trying to impress.
2. Beware “the curse of knowledge.” Have someone read your work and tell you if it makes sense. Your own brain cannot be trusted.
3. Don’t bury the lead. Clarity beats suspense. If they don’t know what it’s about they can’t follow along.
4. You don’t have to play by the rules, but try. If you play it straight 99% of the time, that 1% will really shine.
5. Read Read Read. The English language is too complex to learn from one book. Never stop learning.
6. Good writing means revising. Never hit “send” or “print” without reviewing your work — preferably multiple times.

Rules, rules, rules. There is a science behind these words but as Steven makes clear, language is ever-evolving. It’s organic and alive.

So don’t forget to have some fun with writing, too. As Oscar Wilde said:

A writer is someone who has taught his mind to misbehave.

Find HERE the entire article.

 

 

 

The 12 Cognitive Biases that Prevent You from Being Rational

My friend Carson Clark mentioned on Facebook a very interesting article on cognitive biases, written by George Dvorsky. At the beginning the author tries to clarify his terminology, saying that before proceding ‘it’s important to distinguish between cognitive biases and logical fallacies.
A logical fallacy is an error in logical argumentation (e.g. ad hominem attacks, slippery slopes, circular arguments, appeal to force, etc.).
A cognitive bias, on the other hand, is a genuine deficiency or limitation in our thinking — a flaw in judgment that arises from errors of memory, social attribution, and miscalculations (such as statistical errors or a false sense of probability).
Some social psychologists believe our cognitive biases help us process information more efficiently, especially in dangerous situations. Still, they lead us to make grave mistakes. We may be prone to such errors in judgment, but at least we can be aware of them.’

Here are the 12 cognitive biases in Dvorsky’s article:

1. confirmation bias

2. ingroup bias

3. gambler’s fallacy

How Do Good Listeners Do It?

Lindsay Holmes, from The Huffington Post, talks in a recent article about nine things that makle some people to be good listeners. Here they are.

* * *

They’re present

They’re empathetic

They realize their shortcomings